Back to be single now.
Feels so weird.
Don't know how to describe the feelings now.
And don't want to say much.
Scare that my tears will run out again.
I tell myself can't cry again.
I wanna smile.
Even that's fake.
*SIGH*
Will i be better?
I will.
Really?
His heart is not belong to me.
His soul wont stay with me.
His whole body wont be mine neither.
It's meaningless if i still pull his hand tight with me.
There's only the memories will staying in my mind.
Good luck to him.
Hope he can find a better one.
Better than me.
After these days.
I know that the butterfly in my stomach already fly away.
I gave it's freedom.
It will be more great when flying on the sky.
And have a better owner.
Good luck...........

♥* MISS HIM *♥

It's just pass a day only.We just broke up yesterday and i already miss him like hell.I wanna forget everything about him but i can't.I can't control myself.All i think is just him.WHY?I will be crazy someday.I really can't live without him?My mood really bad right now.My friends asked me where's your smile face?I didn't answer.........Cause i'm blur.The picture of me and him still keep in my wallet.I don't dare to take it out.And i don't want to.Cause i don't want to get the fact that we really broke up.I don't want.I'm cheating of myself.Cheating on my feelings.But i can sure one thing and that's i miss him and i still love him so much.But there's no any way to get back.........

♥* :'[ *♥

We are over.......Mhm.......Where to start?Really complicated....And i'm blur right now.Don't know what to say and don't know what to do....I don't want to think everything but my brain never get rest and stop..Just only the memories with him in my brain..I can't get rid of it...I wanna cry but too much tears to wipe....Maybe broke up is the right decision?He didnt try to get back maybe he's tired too....So not much to say......When i looking at his profile.I just see something i never want to.The album of us.The comments from me.The relationshp status.All just deleted and changed.What can i d again?Nothing.......Don't know.....:'[ I love him so much......But it's the time to let him go.It's the time to put down all the things.It's better for us..........But the pain of my heart will never lost........WEN WEN IS DEAD.....

♥*DRAG ME TO HELL*♥

WOW~This is the movie i'm waiting for.And finally i watched it^^Before watched this movie.My friends and all the people who watched it just said the same things"VERY VERY REALLY REALLY HORRIBLE!" XD And i admit i'm a bit scare before watching it LOL~But i telling myself i have to watch it out!And luckily i bring the cap with me.HAHA!So when i feel there's something horrible wanna show out of that movie.I just using my cap to cover my eyes.LOL~But i still can accept this movie to be honest and there's included funny inside thought =] After watched it.the old women's hand.Fingers.Nails.Knock on the table just impress me.And i dont hope there's something like mosquito.lalat or whatever flying near my ears~EW~SUCKS!I do hope that DRAG ME TO HELL 2 will coming :D I'm waiting^^

♥*DIET *♥

Well.I'm starting my "REAL DIET" recently.Why am i mention "REAL DIET"?Cause i were always planned diet before but never work out cause i easy give up. =_=' And now.I'm really seriously plan this diet.I wanna get slim.I will try my best to hold it and wont give up.Hope that it will work out even just slim 1 kg XD ADD OIL ADD OIL!!!!!!! LOL~And he support me too cause he want me to get slim too~Cause he said more slim more easy to play :O hehe~You got it? XD CAYOCAYO~That's the "pinyin"he know at mandarin.Just made me laugh out loud! :P So i will try my best!!!!!!!!!If the method i do are work then i will sharing it out :) I know i can do it~ Mhm?I doubt myself~ HAHAHA!

♥*FRIENDS ARE IMPORATANT*♥

Mhm..........Well.Friends are really important in life.And good friends are really hard to find.True friends will always by your side nomatter what.They will calm you when you are sad.They will share their happiness with you.They will try to protect you when you get hurt.And they will kick your ass when you being stupid XD.So friends are the best human to sharing anything with =] Once you think the person is your true friends then don't easily let him or her go.Cause you know if you lose them then maybe there's no another that you can called"TRUE FRIEND"So appreciate anyone beside you right now.But sometimes for sure will having argue or fight between friends.And that can be like in good way.For example.Maybe jealous about they got other friends and ignore you.Actually that mean you are care about them.Or i can say like this:Friends are our second relationship partner^^

Well.Let's get on the main point.There's something wrong happened between me and my friends.And that's definitely a mistake.We misundertood each other.And that make us being strange for a while.It's a horrible situation.And i'm sorry for that i didn't trust my friend.I think she get hurt.And really sorry about it. :'[ But finally.everything get fixed.And we being like before again.Always being stupid.But to be honest.I still feel that there's a lil bit strange feelings between us.I don't want to think that much.At least we are happy now.I LOVE YOU ALL.Silly girls :) AW~now i'm missing my bestfriends and singapore though :'[ Hope that we can meet soon.So the conclusion is-WYCY are the best :P Hope you can get what's that mean XD

♥*MHMM*♥

I joined a camp yesterday.And i learn so much from the camp.Let me know that people is useful since born.And there's no shortcut for us to get success.We have to work hard and being confidence to ourselves then you can make things better.Don't always think in the bad way.For sure there's two ways for the situation or a thing.But if you keep thinking about the bad way then you will never success and happy.Everything you must think it's good way nomatter how worst is it.I know it's hard.And i don't even trust myself will be the one like that but i will try my best to make it.And really thanks to yoanne's mother to give me the chance to joined this camp.I do enjoy it =] I really learned so much.And if somebody tell you that"YOU WONT BE SUCCESS!" or anything try to hurt you.And don't try to give up or sad.Just tell them"THANK YOU,I TRUST THAT I WILL BE MORE GREAT." :) And the other thing about me and him.I think we are okay right now.^^ And i will back to Sandakan at July.So i will do his hair XD HAHAHAH~I'm not that pro to be honest~but he has to be the fisrt white mouse for me LOL~But i promised that i will make it good~If not he will going to cry in the corner i think~LMAO~By the way.I really miss him.Hope that the day back to sandakan will coming as fast as it can~:P

♥*I FEEL STRESS*♥

Feel really stress these few days.That's because of my course.If a person get attention by their teacher or either boss in a good way.It's a better feelings for them.But me.I admit i'm not a good student or a clever student and i'm not a hardworking person neither.I just do the things i want to.Maybe that i get interesting in braidings recently so i done the things more faster.So this action catched the eyes of teacher.She told me something good about me and put me in a team.That mean the team is a bit different than others.The members of the team have to being so responsible,hardworking,creative and faster.And will send to saloon to training.That's the things made me really stress.I didn't feel happy at all.I just start worried that i will made them disappointed.Cause i'm not that good.No any confidence at all.ARGH~STRESS STRESS STRESS!!!I have asking the comments from my friend,my housemates,and my family about this.They said it's a great chance for me.And told me to challenge myself.But i'm not a confidence person.I always worried that i will making things worst and done something wrong.I really scared and worried and kinda nervous.What can i do?If i telling my teacher that i wanna out of the team,will it make things better?But my family will be disappointed.


And one thing more.After i join this team.I think i will be more quite.Cause i have to concentrate at the work of hair.And worried again.Worrying about what again?FRIENDS.Really scared that they will think i changed and being so cold and arrogant.Will they understand me?Friends are really important for me.So i hope they can understand me.BLAHBLAHBLAH~tired...........Plus.Got problems with him again =_= BLAHBLAHBLAH~Feel like wanna cry.Really stress.But there's no one understand my feelings at all.I hate this life..........

Finally everything is okay?I can't sure.I just called him and i want to said out all the things in my heart to him.But DAMN!His phone is low battery.At that moment.It really get on my nerves!FUCK!The only thing i can do sms.I type like almost 5 messages to him.And i asked him through sms in the last sentence"Keep or break up.That's your decision"I didn't think much when i wrote this sentence cause i really feel that i can't stand the situation that only i care this relationship again.And i telling myself i already get ready for the bad new from him when he reply me.After an hour or more than an hour.My creepy handphone ringing and i get the sms from him.I open it and i just saw a few words"K E E P".But that doesn't mean anything.So i reply"Keep for what?"And the next sms he reply to me is really touching me even just a few simple words."Keep for our relationship.Until we married.Can't meh?"That's what he wrote.When the moment i reading this sms.My heart smile.I just never expect he will wrote that kind of things.I admit that everyone can said out the things that they never mean or never will do.But i don't care.Cause i love him and i trust every words he said to me.I know i'm silly but i just can't control.After that day.He tell me he will try his best to make me feel that not only me to care this relationship.So i think finally we are okay?Will something wrong happen again?I don't know and i don't want to know.Right now.I wont proactive to sms or call him.I will waiting him to sms me.And i don't want to think too much.Keep everything simple is the best i think.I really miss him so much.But i can't back Sandakan often =_= cause my course~FUCK AGAIN!Miss him damn much! :(

♥*WHAT AM I FOR YOU?*♥

*A BIG SIGH*Stare on this title that i just wrote up.And speechless.I think you can guess what happen again.There's nothing serious happened about me and him.But there's a trouble still between me and him.I don't know how to explain and i don't know how to describe my feelings right now.Complicated.In these few days we be back like before.I just realize i can't live without him but i also realize that really only me care this relationship.There's too much things i wanna complain but i can't cause i know he wont care neither even i complain.It will just make things serious again.People said.There must be one person love and one person being love in a couple.That's right.I do agree.And i admit that i love him so much but i don't want to over love so it's the right time i stop it but i can't promise.I will just doing the same things like how he did to me.I'm not want to revenge.I just don't want to hurt so much.I will just waiting for the day he realize that i changed or neither he said break up or neither just let's the feelings between us disappear and slowly don't find each other anymore.I don't know what's the conclusion.Let's the FATE make the decision.............